![PAY IT FORWARD - Tomasz Jedrzejewski]()
PAY IT FORWARD - Tomasz Jedrzejewski
My son Kacper grumbled in response to the question why he did not want to talk to me when I was lying in the intensive care unit (ICU) after the accident. You'll admit - a resolute and bitter answer for a 6-year-old, which he was in 2015. And I? Could I have taken the time to go to my friend's, finish repairing his car and then quickly pick up my son from kindergarten? Could I have driven slower than 120 km/h? Could I have not overtaken this truck, which at the moment of the maneuver slammed its huge body into the side of my car? If only I had known what would have happened next...
I had a pretty ordinary life.
I lived in a forester's lodge in the small town of Hajda near Jastrowie in Wielkopolska. Although I am a man of the forest, I have not become a forester because I've always been drawn to cars. I graduated from vocational school, got a mechanic's diploma, worked in car repair shops and at construction sites, both in Poland and abroad. Simply I was taking every job that could provide enough money to buy food. I met my partner Marta in 2007. She was my sister's friend. She visited her often. I mean, it quickly turned out that he was visiting me more than my sister. And the effect of these visits is that now we have four children: Kacper (12 years old), Hania (10 years old), Antosia (8 years old) and Patrycja (6 years old).
When was the last time I stood on my own two feet?
After a truck hit my car. I was conscious after I fell out of it. When I got up off the ground to secure the battery, I took a few steps towards the wreckage and fell there. And then I woke up in the ICU. However that was a month later.
Nobody told me I won’t be able to walk again.
The doctor kept asking: "What would you do if you found out that you wouldn't get up on your feet again?" What am I supposed to do? My spinal cord was interrupted in 45 percent. I’ve been paralyzed from the neck down. I couldn't move my arms nor legs. And I couldn't speak either because I had a tracheostomy tube stuck in my throat. What can you do to yourself or by yourself in such a state? So I wasn't told outright that I won’t be able to walk again, but instead, that I had a long, hard rehabilitation ahead of me so I could learn to live again. However, before this process…
… I had spent two years in a hospital palliative ward.
It is said that only patients in an advanced stage of the diseases end up there. For many, it is a department at the end of life's road. For me, it was a stop while waiting for a real rehabilitation in a center in Bydgoszcz. So they let me visit my home and my family. It was a difficult time for us to find ourselves in a new situation. Marta shouted at me, gave me some homework, said frankly that she would not feel sorry for me. Back then I was angry that she did not comfort me. Today I know that such "putting yourself upright" attitude is better. The older son stopped being angry with me, the older daughter encouraged me, and the two youngest still didn't understand much at that time.
I was not admitted to the active rehabilitation camp.
Because I couldn't do anything. Instead, I was recommended a training project held by Doctor Piotr Janaszek’s “Podaj Dalej” Foundation. I went there in September 2019. I’ve learned what is most important to be independent. There, I acknowledged how to live in a normal way every day, not to be a burden for my loved ones, but to be a partner and father. So there I’ve learned how to brush my teeth, wash myself, prepare my own meals, eat by myself, dress myself. And how shave! Because earlier, my son Kacper did it for me. And it should be the other way around. But I also unlearned ... to smoke cigarettes. I’ve returned home in March 2020 when the Covid-19 pandemic broke out.
"Study Daddy, Study!"
That's what kids shouted when they had visited me at the forester's lodge. Yes, we had to split up. Marta lives with them every day in the city where they go to school. So I am waiting with languishment for those moments when Marta would scream at me not to be lazy and the kids will argue about who is going to be the first to push my wheelchair and who will sit on my lap. And now, when they are gone, I create our new future. A career counselor helps me to set up a business - my own car repair shop. For now, I will manage it, deal with orders, papers and contacts with customers. Colleagues will take care of the mechanical repairs. And I hope to join them someday.
Because I want to get my hands dirty again.
And then scrub those hands feeling like I've done another good job. It is possible. I just need to strengthen and improve my hands condition in order to do more stuff with them. That is why I would like to return to training apartments and rehabilitation classes in Osada Janaszkowo. And that's the reason why I'm waiting for Osada.
(The text was written and published on July 1, 2021)
![PAY IT FORWARD - Tomasz Jedrzejewski]()
PAY IT FORWARD - Tomasz Jedrzejewski
![PAY IT FORWARD - Tomasz Jedrzejewski]()
PAY IT FORWARD - Tomasz Jedrzejewski
![PAY IT FORWARD - Tomasz Jedrzejewski]()
PAY IT FORWARD - Tomasz Jedrzejewski